As people of faith lead by the Holy Spirit given to us by Jesus Christ through God's (Yahweh) grace before we were conceived; we are called to a higher standard than the world. Not that we are better than any anyone but we should be the example to all.
We Have a Higher Calling
It is so hurtful to my heart when I see people who have been give the explicit direction, by Jesus Christ Himself, to love one another, fighting. This must end for the body of Christ, especially His church.
We have the outline given to us by Christ in the Bible of how to handle and resolve disputes.
Matt 18:16-20
With commentary break down
“If your brother sins against you, go and rebuke him in private. If he listens to you, you have won your brother.
This is negotiation, the first step in dispute resolution. It is normally very private and limited to the main parties. Many times this is done without third-party assistance. We all negotiate everyday, especially if you have kids. Negotiation is how we buy a car, make decisions with others and pick a restaurant with our spouse.
But if he won’t listen, take one or two more with you, so that by the testimony of two or three witnesses every fact may be established.
This is mediation, the second step in dispute resolution. Mediation involves a neutral third-party or parties who help you workout the problem, find a solution and repair relationships. The biblical purpose of the witnesses: they are neutral, unbiased, non-decision makers who hear the parties and helped them hear (not just listen to respond) to the other side. They were witnesses as to the proof of an agreement. Today, we write it down and notarize a memorandum, so memories don’t fade.
If he pays no attention to them, tell the church.
This is arbitration, the third step in dispute resolution. If you look deeper historically into this statement, “when you took it to the church”, you literally took it for a third-party decision. The elders, the church body or high priests heard all sides to the matter, witnesses, evidence and may perform inspections of the disputed matter/area. They decided the matter for you, just like today’s arbitrators. Ever watch Judge Judy? She is an arbitrator not a judge. Only on TV do arbitrators wear black robes.
But if he doesn’t pay attention even to the church, let him be like an unbeliever and a tax collector to you.
This is the last step in the dispute resolution process, litigation (court). Notice how this is worded. “he doesn’t pay attention to them”. An arbitrator cannot put you in jail for not following the award. Just like the church could not have you flogged but both take it to the seated authority for affirmation. The problem with going to litigation or the governor, king, etc. this ends without a peaceful resolution, which may be possible with the help of a neutral third-party. In the old days this could end in your death, where today; it could be jail.
I assure you: Whatever you bind on earth is already bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth is already loosed in heaven. Again, I assure you: If two of you on earth agree about any matter that you pray for, it will be done for you by My Father in heaven. For where two or three are gathered together in My name, I am there among them.”
Christ lets us know here that this is heavenly approved dispute resolution. We cannot bind material things in heaven; so, in this case it means a binding agreement or forgiveness of a matter. Prayer should be what we do before taking on any battle, to weigh the costs and gain wisdom though the the Holy Spirit. “Pray” here means to “ask with good conscience and cause for justice”; as today, we “Pray the court” when we ask the judiciary for a ruling.
Christ sums this up with, when we “agree about any matter that you pray for”, it will be done. God and Christ are the witnesses to the agreement, the administrative empowering authority to the conclusion.
Since this entire statement was made in one setting, poorly titled in some versions, there is just no other way for me to see this passage. Notice the quotation marks “” starting at 16 and ending at 20, further solidifying my belief of a single thought and instruction. I don’t have enough room to get into historical preference, love and other scholarly passages.
As Christians and people of faith, what has brought us to this place? Brothers fighting against brothers in a place of worship!
What has came between respectable people, pastors, elders and members to push us to this point?
Is this what the body of Christ wants to see? Our churches put on display for the world to see our blasphemy? Of course not, this is the world’s influence!
Once we have unresolved issues within the church body, the next step is a congregational split. If you have never experienced one, it’s the most hurtful and heart wrenching experience. People leave with literal hatred of each other.
How do We Fix this?
We must turn back to God, His teachings and His precepts and a most important one, as shown earlier, His dispute resolution model. The use of alternative dispute resolution (ADR) is the proper adjustment to our world and was given in cited law by the Honorable Chief Justice Warren Burger of the United States Supreme Court, back in the 1970’s. If you study any history, you will see there is a VAST history in most every culture to resolve disputes peacefully. From Native American Peacemakers to Confucius to Abraham to Christ. We cannot have love without peace but love is not acceptance of sin and peace is not surrender to wrong. That is why we have a hierarchy of dispute resolution, to retain love, restore relationships and resolve matters peacefully.
Not Every Problem is within the Body?
This is so true but did Christ say, if you harm another outside the church, love is of no concern? No!
We must fight righteously for the proper methodology and do everything in our power to resolve disputes amicably. This is biblical, shows love, takes responsibility and honors the Father.
If WE have wronged another, we must take responsibility for this, resolve the problem the best we can, put measures in place to prevent the same or similar and make amends not to just them but to Him. This is not easy to do but we know “small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life”.
We are called to this higher standard; yet, we still must protect our church. That is where resolution works over judicial order. Once a judge has the power and makes that order, its final. While we have the power in our own hands, we have the power to do what is right, even if it’s not easy.
Lets Talk about Your Resolution
I know its not easy to have a problem and I know you have tens to thousands of people looking up to you and you may have done nothing wrong. Show them there is a biblical methodology to handle disputes. PhloxADR was created for this specific purpose to resolve disputes more peacefully.
Send me a quick message or call me 405-765-8030 and we can see how to best serve each other in Christ.
